It can be a real pain to read contracts these days.  I recently had to sign a four-page contract just to buy a car battery at Pep Boys.  iTunes, software, and website checkout terms are pages and pages of confusing language, while you should never consent to an agreement without reading it, the consequences of clicking the “I Agree” button without reading those contracts are likely pretty minimal.  Contracts and agreements are usually full of legal language that the everyday person does not use often if ever because they are written almost exclusively by lawyers.  However, there are some contracts that you really need to read carefully.  Major purchases and services such as a vehicle, remodeling, investment, or private loan contract must be read.  Often, having a lawyer read through a contract and review it with you can keep you out of court.  If a contract involves your business, it is doubly important to have an attorney assist you.  I have come across some franchise agreements in my practice that are particularly unfair to the person starting the franchise.  Unfortunately, I have heard the words from my clients far too many times “I would not have signed it if I knew that was in there.”

There are many commercial and consumer law attorneys out there who would gladly review a contract for you if you are not comfortable reading that contract.  Again, the language in contracts can be very confusing even to the most sophisticated consumer or business owner.  You’d be surprised at how inexpensive a contract review from an attorney would cost.  $250-$750 for a contract review could be relatively inexpensive when you are ready to pay $10,000 or more of your hard-earned money for a large purchase or service.  You do not want to be surprised by what could be hiding in the middle of that small print.

One band came up with a genius way to make sure that the contract they sent to the venue was carefully read.  We have all had a great laugh at what entertainers have demanded to be provided backstage.  From Cher needing an extra room for wigs to Mötley Crüe requiring local AA meeting schedules, a sub-machine gun, a 12-foot boa constrictor and a jar of Grey Poupon mustard; these parts of the contract have become a competition among stars to make the most outlandish terms.  These all started with Van Halen and a bowl of M&Ms.

Van Halen’s 1982 world tour was one of the first big traveling rock shows.  It required 9 semi-trucks full of gear and set that weighed almost as much as a 747 jet.  The lighting and stage setup necessitated specific weight and electrical requirements of the venues.  If these requirements were not carefully adhered to, it could be extremely dangerous and deadly for both the band and the fans.  Someone within the band’s staff got the idea of placing some language right in the middle of the technical requirements that would alert the band that the venue had not carefully read the contract.  Here is what the contract contained:

If the band showed up and there were no M&M’s or the M&M’s had brown ones in the bowl, they knew that the venue had not read the technical requirements and the stage may be unsafe to perform.  If this term was violated, the venue would still have to pay the band without the show going on; which happened in Colorado costing the venue $85,000.  The story of this condition in the contract and the trashing of a dressing room for violating this term became rock legend and the practical purpose gave way to the image of the eccentric rock star.  However, it is a great reminder to consumers and attorney to carefully read the whole contract.

Some lawyers still play this game when drafting contracts negotiated with other parties.  I’ve heard stories of attorneys sending over various drafts of contracts to another attorney with terms like “every other Friday, your office must deliver to our office a bottle of Bourbon.”  It can be a fun reminder that contracts need to be carefully read and understood.  If you have a contract that you’d like reviewed, reach out to me through my website and I can make sense of the language for you.